Thought this was funny
Thought this was funny
For jeep owners....
___________
James Orofino
1970 CJ5
1958 Willys Wagon
Made me laugh out loud James. Thank you!
___________
Tom
-.- . ----- .-- - -.-.
FINOCJ (December 10th, 2019)
And this guy and his jeep are what my mind rolls to (classic windshield down, no roll bar):
alanmikkelsen (December 24th, 2019)
NEIL DIAMOND: touching hands
CDC: no don’t touch hands
NEIL DIAMOND: reaching out
CDC: please avoid that
NEIL DIAMOND: TOUCHING YOU-
CDC: everyone is Boston is doomed
STING: Don't stand
Don't stand so
Don't stand so close to me
CDC: Now you're talkin
STING: Every breath you take, every step you make...
CDC: Yes, we will be watching you.
Proclaimers:
But I would walk 500 miles
and I would walk 500 more
just to be the man who walks a thousand miles
to fall down at your door
CDC: Please quarantine in place
MC Hammer: You can't touch this
CDC: Not without proper sterilization and washing hands
JIM MORRISON: COME ON, COME ON, COME ON NOW TOUCH ME, BABY!
CDC: That is not advised.
JIM MORRISON: CAN'T YOU SEE THAT I AM NOT AFRAID?
CDC: Immaterial.
Phil Collins: Shes seems to have an invisible touch
CDC: get her into quarantine immediately!
Pink Floyd: HEY YOU
CDC: oh hell
Pink Floyd: out there on your own
CDC: ok, self quarantined, not so bad
Pink Floyd: sitting naked by the phone WOULD YOU TOUCH ME
CDC: god damnit
EXILE: I want to kiss you all over
CDC: Absolutely not.
EXILE: and over again.
CDC: GOTTDAMNIT!!
Alanis: Cause I got one hand in my pocket.
CDC: Make sure it's sanitized.
Alanis: And the other one is giving a high five.
CDC: That's it. I quit!
MILEY: "It's a Party in the USA!"
CDC: "You really should avoid large gatherings."
MILEY: "My tummy's turnin' and I'm feelin' kinda home sick!"
CDC: "See! What did I tell you?"
Bon Jovi: You're love is like bad medicine.
CDC: We're actually still finding the cure.
Bon Jovi: Bad medicine is what I need.
CDC: It most certainly is not.
BEATLES: Yeah you, got that something, I think you'll understand
CDC: It's Covid-19
BEATLES: I wanna hold your hand
CDC: Not advisable
BEATLES: I wanna hold your hand
CDC: No
Eddie Money: Take me home tonight!
CDC: NO!
Foreigner: “I’M HOT-BLOODED! Check it and see.”
CDC: “Well, yes, we do advise constant monitoring of body tempera
Foreigner: “I’VE GOT A FEVER OF A HUNDRED AND THREE!”
CDC: “Dear God. Why are you still singing? Can we get an ambulance here? Right away?”
Robert Palmer: Doctor, doctor, give me the news. I've got.a bad case
CDC: Oh no...
Palmer: Of loving you
CDC: *sigh of relief*
Tom (March 1st, 2020)
.
___________
Tom
-.- . ----- .-- - -.-.
Perfection would be a straight six sitting next to a Wrangler tub.
If you've never heard of lutefisk, google it.
Schmitty (February 17th, 2022)
I recently learned how to say "What's up dog!" in Japanese.
"Konichihuahua"
___________
05 4Runner Sport - 3" lift, 35s & v8 POWA!
Jackie (November 3rd, 2020)
I haven't had lefse in decades.
Truth right here
Not a joke per se, but I saw this today and thought "Well, Charles Spurgeon clearly never owned a Jeep"
___________
Steven
2004 Wrangler Rubicon
Tom (November 10th, 2020)
ARBITRAITOR
A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald's.
BERNADETTE
The act of torching a mortgage.
BURGLARIZE
What a crook sees through.
AVOIDABLE
What a bullfighter tries to do.
COUNTERFEITER
Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.
LEFT BANK
What the bank robbers did when their bag was full of money.
HEROES
What a man in a boat does.
PARASITES
What you see from the Eiffel Tower.
PARADOX
Two physicians.
PHARMACIST
A helper on a farm.
RELIEF
What trees do in the spring.
RUBBERNECK
What you do to relax your wife.
SELFISH
What the owner of a seafood store does.
SUDAFED
Brought litigation against a government official.
Tom (February 27th, 2021)
The 12 Seasons of Colorado
Schmitty (February 17th, 2022),speedkills (May 18th, 2021),Tom (May 14th, 2021)
This should be sent only to those whose level of maturity qualifies them to relate to it... (in larger type because they need it)
1966: Long hair
2021: Longing for hair
1966: KEG
2021: EKG
1966: Acid rock
2021: Acid reflux
1966: Moving to California because it's cool
2021: Moving to Arizona because it's warm
1966: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
2021: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
1966: Seeds and stems
2021: Roughage
1966: Hoping for a BMW
2021: Hoping for a BM
1966: Going to a new, hip joint
2021: Receiving a new hip joint
1966: Rolling Stones
2021: Kidney Stones
1966: Screw the system
2021: Upgrade the system
1966: Disco
2021: Costco
1966: Parents begging you to get your hair cut
2021: Children begging you to get their heads shaved
1966: Passing the drivers' test
2021: Passing the vision test
1966: Whatever
2021: Depends
—
Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly change things.
Each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together a list to try to give the faculty a sense of the mindset of this year's incoming freshmen. Here's this year's list:
The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 2003.
They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.
Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.
The CD was introduced 7 years before they were born.
They have always had an answering machine.
They have always had cable.
They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.
They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.
They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.
They never heard: "Where's the Beef?", "I'd walk a mile for a Camel", or "de plane, Boss, de plane".
They do not care who shot J. R. & have no idea who J. R. even is.
McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.